42 Comments

What better way to conclude the AusTender segment of this piece than with a Happy Ending!

Also, will definitely be adding Dog Obstacles to my vocal warm ups going forward.

Also, also, Die Failure Investigation - hard LOL - soft tautology. OMG I am dead. hahaha

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That was one of those ones where I’m like “is this just for me? Is that all this is for?” So this gives me heart!

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This was what my high school German was for!

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🤣🤣🤣

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“sending them off to redeem one (1) AUKUS submarine in 2055” bahaha, very good

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Maybe this is just a context thing, but 'jungle bunnies' is a phrase I can only recall ever hearing from some pretty racist people with pretty racist intent. It didn't refer to people wearing jungle green camo gear...

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Jesus I just looked it up. I’ve never heard it in that context before. There was a kid at school in cadets (white) who was called this and I’ve always associated it with camo for that reason. Think I’ll change it!

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That is one of the best reasons for appreciating you as a human being and brilliant writer, Rick Morton.

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Only time I’ve ever heard it was my ex (a person of colour) recalling it as a racist taunt hurled at him during his school years in England in the 70s. I assumed you didn’t know this usage and came to suggest considering an alternative.

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I’m assuming *she says hopefully* that at least these little gems are still transparently available, and that even if obscure, it does to at least some degree show that we’re still living under an open process. I feel a little bit comforted by this, given we live in the era of DOGE now, and very glad you’re trawling these lists!

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so so so many big belly laughs. god i love this newsletter - highlight of my week

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same same

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The management of the ABC is covering itself in shame over Latouffe. It’s a wonder the entire staff haven’t risen up in revolt!

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Reading this fills me with joy..as always..take care Rick..

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This is so brilliant! I’m crying with laughter! 🙏

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Thank you for your menu of splendidly awful musings dear Nervous. What's not to love?

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Youre on fire today Rick. My various chuckles snorts and straight out cackling disturbed the felines of this abode. Top notch amusement with a serve of background wtf.

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As always, a dose of laughter in dire times - thank you.

One can only look on Trumpworld with a sense of horror and dismay but the occasional laugh makes it all worth while.

Can I suggest for those who are interested, the Status Kuo, a US writer chronicling the decline of US civilisation in real time, but always with a sense of hope. - https://statuskuo.substack.com/

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You had me at "Musk’s incel clown posse." 😂

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Mnn? I was a procurement officer once. How about a contract for the removal of bones from Boggo Road Gaol? I kid you not! Shall I spoil the fun by explaining that contract?

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"Imagine the kinds of hurdles you could put in front of a dog for $13,400"

Supplied by an entity called "Metal and More PL" they could also be quite painful.

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Thank you. I really needed some humour today! Eye opening too!

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I never thought I would enjoy going down the rabbit hole of the Aus tender website but I did…….oh how I did!

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